Nightmares
by dreams-we-dwell-on
Summary: Maura receives a call in the middle of the night from a sobbing Detective. Eventual Rizzles.
1. Chapter 1

Maura awoke to the sound of her phone vibrating on the bedside table and she frowned slightly before reaching blindly for it.

"Hello?" she answered groggily.

"Maur?" came Jane's voice, even rougher than usual.

"Mmm?"

"I'm sorry," said Jane hesitantly, "did I wake you?"

Maura rolled over in bed, blearily opening her eyes to look at the clock on the nightstand.

"Jane, it's three o' clock in the morning." Her voice sounded exasperated, almost whiny but she couldn't help it– she was exhausted. "Considering I'm a part of the majority of the adult population who sleep the standard eight hours a night, it would be safe to assume that calling me at three in the morning would, in fact, be waking me."

This was quite a lot for Maura to say, considering she was still half asleep and it took Jane a moment to process it all.

"I'm sorry," she finally said. "I can call back in the morning if you want."

Maura frowned.

"It is technically the morning," she said wearily, "and besides, I'm awake now."

On the other end of the line, Jane smiled slightly, even though there were still tears sliding down her cheeks.

"Jane? Is everything okay?"

Maura's sleepy voice floated through the phone, and Jane had to press a hand against her mouth to try and muffle the sobs that were desperately trying to escape.

"Jane?" The question came more urgently this time. "What's going on?"

"I-I'm fine," Jane managed to choke out. The silence on the other end of the line told her that Maura didn't believe the lie. "I just had a nightmare is all." She wiped furiously at the tears that refused to slow.

More silence, until Maura finally spoke.

"Do you want me to come over?"

Jane hesitated, this was after all the reason that she had called the Doctor in the middle of the night, but at the same time she felt so weak at even the thought of asking for help. She opened her mouth to say no.

"Yes," she sobbed instead, "Please Maur, can you come?"

It wasn't her finest moment, and just the thought of Maura seeing her like this, sweaty and sobbing, made her feel terrified and incredibly vulnerable. But she needed to see the honey blonde, needed to wrap her arms around Maura and feel her heart beat against her own.

"Okay," Maura's voice was panicky. "I'm coming right now, okay? Jane? I'll be there as soon as I can."

The response she got was Jane crying down the phone, which only heightened Maura's panic.

"Hurry," said Jane, and she hung up, curling herself into a ball on the cool tiles of the bathroom floor.

Her heart thumping furiously in her chest, Maura grabbed her keys and phone, fumbling with the doorknob in her rush to leave the house. _I'm coming, Jane, _she thought, _I'm on my way._

The frantic, hurried knock pulled Jane out of her stupor. She stumbled to the front door and in one smooth motion, flung it open. There was Maura. She was dressed only in her silk pajamas, wearing no make up and with her hair still mussed from sleep.

But relief flooded Jane at the sight of her; whole, safe. Alive.

"Oh god, Jane," Maura's voice was still panicky, but Jane reached for her anyway.

And then there were Maura's arms, soft and warm, pulling the brunette close and tugging her over to the couch. Jane sobbed into honey blonde hair, pulling the smaller woman as close as she could.

Maura rubbed circles on the Detective's back, trying to keep her own breathing even, and fighting to keep the tears from falling.

"Shhh, it's okay," she whispered. "Everything's okay. It was just a dream."

"He got you, Maur," sobbed Jane. Maura pulled her closer, one hand tangled in brunette curls, the other pressed against the small of her back. "Hoyt got you."

"He didn't," the Doctor murmured. "He's dead, Jane. You're safe."

"I- I needed to feel you," she whispered into the blonde's hair.

"I know, sweetie. I know." Maura could feel Jane's sobs slowing already, but she continued to murmur to her.

"He's gone, Jane, he's dead. You're safe. I've got you."

"Stay with me," Jane managed, even as the doctor's heartbeat lulled her into slumber.

"I'll never leave you," Maura whispered, and she pressed a kiss to the top of the brunette's head, before pulling her closer and allowing them both to slip into a dreamless sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N- Hey guys. Thanks for everyone who read and reviewed the first chapter. Everything's been crazy busy lately but I'm on uni break now so can hopefully update more often. I'm still new at this whole fanfiction thing, so any feedback is appreciated. Hope you enjoy! x**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

* * *

When Jane awoke the next morning, it was to find herself snuggled up against Maura on the couch. She lay still for a moment, appreciating the feel of the slender woman against her and breathing in the light strawberry scent of her shampoo. A slow smile crept across Jane's face as she watched the doctor in peaceful sleep. It didn't take long however, until the memory of the previous night (or technically morning) flooded back to her.

Guilt squirmed in her stomach and Jane carefully eased herself away from the sleeping blonde and crept into the kitchen.

What had she been _thinking_? Calling Maura in the middle of the night to look after her, crying in her arms and begging to be soothed? It wasn't like Jane at all and she felt a hot rush of humiliation at the thought of it. Not to mention it was incredibly unfair on Maura to force her to deal with all of Jane's _issues_…

After knowing the blonde for several years, Jane's feelings had begun to develop. They had been colleagues, who became acquaintances, then best friends, and Jane could no longer think of a word to describe what the doctor was to her. She was definitely more family than friend, but the feelings Jane harbored for her were far from sisterly. She had long ago decided, however, to keep them to herself. Maura was the most important person in her life, and she wasn't going to jeopardize that because of feelings that the blonde didn't return.

That's why it was unfair of Jane to call her in the middle of the night, she reasoned. It wasn't fair to expect Maura to take care of her when she needed it; regardless of the fact that the blonde would insist it was no trouble. She shouldn't make Maura feel obligated to come round and comfort her, just because she wasn't sleeping well. It wasn't fair, to Maura, or to herself, if she kept on thinking, and acting like the two of them were more than what they were.

Jane sighed and put on a pot of coffee, reasoning that the both of them were going to need a large dose of caffeine to get them through the day.

Jane was rummaging around in the cupboard for something Maura- appropriate to eat, when she heard soft footsteps behind her. Turning, she saw the sleepy looking doctor padding into the kitchen in her silk pajamas and bare feet.

"Hey," said Maura softly, examining Jane's face carefully, looking for a trace of the vulnerable woman she had seen the night before.

What she got in return was Jane's usual crooked smile and a cup of coffee placed directly in front of her.

"Morning," replied Jane, a little too brightly for what the occasion called for. "I made coffee."

Maura smiled slightly.

"I see that."

She took a grateful sip before wrinkling her nose in disgust.

"Jane?" She asked. "Did you just serve me instant?"

The brunette laughed at the horrified expression on Maura's face.

"Sorry," she said. "It's all I've got. I tried to find you some breakfast too but I don't think I have anything organic, pesticide free, non- processed, made from panda poop or-"

"Healthy?" Maura laughed.

"Exactly."

"That's okay," the blonde replied softly. She looked at Jane for a long moment before the Detective broke eye contact awkwardly.

"Are you okay, Jane?" She asked.

Jane forced a smile as another hot rush of guilt flooded her stomach.

"Sorry Maur, guess I freaked you out a little last night, huh?"

The doctor nodded slowly.

"'Freaked out' is quite an understatement, Jane."

"I'm sorry," she said softly, taking the other woman's hand in her own. "I shouldn't have dragged you over here in the middle of the night, Maur."

"Yes, you should have," Maura frowned. "You're my best friend, Jane, and you're always there for me. So just let me do the same, okay?"

Jane smiled slightly.

"Okay."

The two of them sipped at their coffee in comfortable silence, thoughts drifting, until Maura's wandering eyes sought out the clock.

"Jane! We're going to be late!"

Jane looked from Maura to the clock in confusion.

"Chill, Maur," she laughed.

She watched in amusement as the smaller woman dashed around her living room, searching for her keys and phone.

"No, I won't 'chill' Jane! I've still got to go home and get changed and–"

"Put some shoes on?" Jane asked, laughing again, as she realized that the blonde had arrived the night before in bare feet.

"Jane! This isn't funny."

"It is Maura," the brunette laughed. "And relax, because it's Saturday. And we're both off."

"Oh," said the blonde, looking down at the date on her phone for confirmation. "Right."

Jane smirked, leaning lazily against the kitchen counter and taking a sip of her coffee.

"Are you going to come and have some of this?" she asked. "Even though it's instant?"

Maura scrunched her nose adorably, but walked back over to her friend, sitting at one of the bar stools and reaching for her coffee.

"What are we doing today then?" she asked, looking up at Jane expectantly.

The brunette shrugged.

"Hang out. There's a game on, we can order pizza and have a movie night?"

Maura frowned slightly, considering her friend's idea.

"Or we could go to the new art exhibit that opened last week? It's a fascinating look on the way that–"

"Mauraaaa," Jane moaned. "It's my day off. I don't want to go to some boring art thing."

Jane," said Maura seriously. "You served me instant."

* * *

An hour later, they were both ready to leave.

"Just let me feed Jo Friday," Jane said, as the little dog yipped, following her around the kitchen.

There was a knock at the door and Jane groaned.

"Can you get that, Maur? I bet it's Ma. Tell her to go away."

Maura was laughing as she opened the door, but the smile quickly slipped from her lips at the person standing there. It wasn't Angela Rizzoli.

It was Casey.

"Hi, Maura," he smiled at her, smarmy as always. "I didn't expect to see you here."

Maura frowned, looking him over. He was standing without aid of a crutch or a chair.

"Likewise."

"Is Jane in?" he asked and he stepped over the threshold without invitation, pushing past Maura as if he owned the place. Or as if he owned Jane.

"Maur, was it–" Jane stopped, staring at the man in the middle of her living room. "Casey."

"Hey, Jane." He grinned, holding out his arms slightly as if waiting for her to move into his embrace.

She didn't.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

Maura was surprised at her tone. There was no excitement, no happiness, not even anger. Jane just looked vaguely confused.

Casey too, looked a little shocked at Jane's reaction. He dropped his arms and shrugged sheepishly.

"Well," he said, "as you can probably tell, the surgery worked."

Jane nodded, her eyes raking over his form.

Maura felt a twitch of jealousy as she watched something flicker over Jane's face. Lust perhaps? Or delight? But it was gone quickly enough that it could have been her imagination.

"I should go," she said. "You two would probably like to talk."

"Okay," said Casey instantly. "Good to see you."

"I'm glad your surgery went well," Maura replied stiffly. After all, she couldn't lie, and so she couldn't tell the man she it was good to see him too, when she really wanted to punch him in his newly working–

"Maura!"

"Hmm?" she asked, disrupted from her thoughts.

"I said you don't have to go. We have plans- Casey and I can just talk later."

"Oh," said Maura, turning to look at a disgruntled Casey. "No, it's fine, Jane. You stay and catch up. You didn't really want to go the exhibit anyway. I'll go alone."

"Maura, don't be ridiculous, I said I'd go–"

"Don't worry," Maura cut in, plastering on her society smile. "I'll see you tomorrow for Sunday dinner?"

And she was gone.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed the last chapter. And for the Guest who complained about Casey, there is Rizzles coming- I'm sorry I thought that was a given! Enjoy x**

* * *

Jane sighed as Maura left. She'd had such high hopes for the day and a single knock at the door had changed everything.

She wanted to go after Maura. The look on the blonde's face as she let herself out would be enough to make anyone crumble, and yet Jane had just stood and watched. Guilt flooded through her, but she resolved to apologise to Maura the next day at Sunday dinner. She turned her attention back to Casey.

* * *

Maura could hardly breathe. Her head was spinning and the ground felt unsteady beneath her. She could feel the hives coming.

She had just lied to her best friend. A white lie, most would say, but a lie nonetheless. She had no intention of going to the museum alone; she wanted to go with Jane. And if she couldn't go with Jane, she didn't want to go at all.

She got into the car, taking deep breaths as she did so. A white lie, for Jane's benefit. The brunette wanted to stay and talk to Casey, Maura was sure of it. Jane had talked of him non-stop before he, once again, disappeared off the face of the Earth. And Maura wasn't going to stand in the way of Jane's happiness, regardless of what she thought about Casey.

She put the car into gear, and headed back to her own house. Her home wasn't like Jane's apartment, it wasn't full of life and warmth, but it was where she lived, and she had Bass to keep her company. He might not be the most interactive of pets but she loved him. Besides, she was used to being alone with Bass, and it wasn't so terrible.

Although, she reasoned, it would be difficult to go back to loneliness, now that she'd had a taste of something different. Jane had brought family, love and laughter into her life, and Maura was worried that if things became serious between Jane and Casey, that she would take them with her as she went. That thought made Maura's throat unusually tight so she tried not to dwell on it.

* * *

Jane awoke trembling, with tears spilling down her cheeks. She could feel the warmth of a body to her side and her breathing eased. _Maura, _she thought, reaching over for the blonde. But her arms instead wrapped around a much larger torso and she recoiled in shock before realising who the person in her bed was.

Casey. He rolled over, mumbling something in his sleep as he wrapped an arm around her slender waist.

After Maura left the day before, Jane and Casey had talked. He had told her that he wanted them to be together and had apologised for his behaviour. Jane had given much thought to her response; as her Ma was frequently reminding her, she was getting old. She had never been too fond of the idea of marriage and kids, but she didn't want to end up alone either. Plus, she spent the majority of her time with Maura, which really wasn't helping Jane to get over the feelings she had developed for her best friend. Her incredibly smart, gorgeous, nerdy, adorable, best friend. And since things with Maura were never going to happen, she had decided to welcome back Casey with open arms. It was easier to spend her time and energy pining over a man she'd never really wanted, than over a woman she couldn't live without. That had been Jane's reasoning anyway, and it was why she had slept with Casey the night before, and ended up waking up to him after another nightmare.

But Jane didn't want Casey to comfort her, or to look after her. She just wanted Maura. She wanted Maura alive, safe, and preferably curled up in her arms.

Still shaking, with her mind reeling from images of Maura held in Hoyt's foul grasp, Jane disentangled herself from Casey's arms and got dressed as silently as she could. Accidentally waking Jo Friday in the process, she clipped a leash onto the little dog, deciding that she was welcome to come too. Jane paused for a moment, debating leaving a note for Casey, explaining where she'd gone, but she didn't really care enough. He'd figure it out, she decided, as she grabbed her keys and coat and headed out the door.

* * *

The clock on her nightstand read 2:47am, and Maura still wasn't asleep. Normally, when this happened, she would think through the disruptions to her usual schedule and consider if any of those could have affected her ability to rest. However, she knew why it was that she couldn't sleep, it was just that there was nothing she could do about it. With a sigh, Maura climbed out of bed, heading downstairs. She put on the kettle and was sipping a cup of chamomile tea when she was disrupted by a noise.

It was knocking, she realised. There was someone knocking on her front door at three o' clock in the morning. Maura frowned and put down her newly- made tea, heading towards the entrance of her home. A quick glance through the peephole, relieved the tension in her shoulders, and she couldn't help the small smile that spread across her face as she unlocked the door and flung it open.

"Jane," she breathed, taking in every inch of the dishevelled brunette.

"Hey, Maur," Jane smiled slightly but it didn't reach her eyes. "Can I come in?"

"Of course." The blonde stepped back, allowing Jane and Jo Friday to enter, closing the door behind them. "What are you doing here in the middle of the night?"

Jane blushed, and Maura felt instantly guilty for prying.

"I'm sorry," she said quickly, "I'm just surprised to see you."

"It's okay," the brunette replied. "It's an understandable question." She gave Maura a half smile as she bent down to take Jo off of her leash. "I couldn't sleep," she added, by way of explanation.

"Neither could I. I've just made tea, if you'd like some?"

Jane nodded slightly, following Maura into the kitchen. As she poured another cup, Maura took the opportunity to study her friend. There were slight shadows under her eyes, which were red rimmed. She deduced that Jane had had another nightmare, and she had once again woken up in tears. Maura passed Jane the second cup, pondering what the appropriate thing to say would be. In the end she didn't have to, because Jane spoke first.

"I had another nightmare."

"I gathered as much," said Maura sympathetically.

"It was Hoyt again- with you again. I just wanted to see you. I wanted to make sure that you were okay."

Jane's eyes were welling up and without even thinking, Maura reached for her, pulling the brunette into a tight embrace.

"I'm fine, Jane. Everything's okay."

Jane sniffed.

"I know. And I know that Hoyt's gone- forever… it's just harder to believe that in the middle of the night. Especially when I don't have you there."

Maura couldn't help but think that she would have been there if Casey hadn't come barging back into Jane's life again, but she knew that there would be a better time to discuss that. At that moment, Jane needed comfort, and so that was exactly what Maura was going to give her.

"I'm here now," she said, pressing a kiss to untamed, dark curls.

They stood in silence for a few minutes until Jane finally pulled away, wiping her face on the back of her sleeve.

"I'm sorry."

A perfectly sculpted blonde brow rose.

"Why are you sorry, Jane?"

"For everything," she said, looking down into her cup to avoid serious hazel eyes. "For yesterday, with Casey, and the exhibit, and for waking you up last night, and for coming round crying tonight. It isn't fair on you. Any of it."

Maura frowned, looking over her friend to see if she was serious. It appeared she was.

"Jane, that's ridiculous. You have nothing to apologise for. You're my best friend, and I'm here for you. In whichever way you need."

Jane smiled at the sincerity in the blonde's voice.

"Thanks, Maur," she said quietly, offering Maura a smile which the doctor didn't return.

"You don't believe me do you?" she asked, taking one of Jane's hands in her own. "Jane, I don't know what I have to do to convince you, but I want you to listen to me. You are _the _most important person in my life and I love you. I've lost count of how many times you've looked after me or protected me, and if comforting you because your nightmares- of a deranged serial killer, I might add- have come back, then that is the least I can do. And if that means I get a few less hours sleep, then that is a price I will gladly pay."

Once again, the tears threatened to fall, so Jane pulled Maura in close to her, hoping that the blonde would understand all that she wanted to say. They stayed like that for a moment, each soaking in the warmth of the other.

"Come on," said Maura eventually, pulling on the brunette's hand. "Let's get some sleep."

She led Jane up to her room and slid in under the covers on her side, flicking off the bedside lamp as she did. Jane quickly kicked off her shoes before climbing in next to the blonde. She paused for a moment, watching Maura's face in the moonlight, before moving in closer to her best friend, wrapping her arms around her and burying her face in honey blonde curls.

"Goodnight, Jane." Maura leaned into the embrace, looping an arm around the brunette's waist.

"Night, Maur."

And blissfully, they slept.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hey guys, sorry this update took so long, to be honest I was just having so much trouble with this chapter! I'm still not happy with it but I decided to just post it anyway before I went completely bonkers. Hope you like!**

* * *

The next morning found Jane and Maura curled together under the warm blankets. Maura, generally being an early riser, woke first, and took a moment to enjoy the feeling of her best friend's body curled around her own, a long fingered hand pressed tight against her flat stomach. This, Maura thought, she could get used to. Waking up next to the woman she loved, safe, warm and perfectly content. For a moment, she let herself imagine. She would roll over and press a soft kiss to Jane's mouth, waking the brunette who would then respond eagerly. Then Jane would flip them, leaning over Maura as she trailed a line of kisses down her stomach. Maura sighed as she looked at the sleeping detective. That was her fantasy, what she wanted. Not what Jane wanted. Maura frowned slightly and disentangled herself from her friend. She'd feel better after a cup of coffee.

* * *

Jane awoke alone and she reached over instantly, feeling the empty space where Maura had been. The sheets were still warm, Jane noted and she rolled over to look at Maura's alarm clock. 7:30am. Seriously? 7:30am on a Sunday? That woman was crazy. Jane sighed, stretching her along body out across the whole bed, before kicking off the covers and going to find Maura.

* * *

Jane's phone was ringing. The first time it went off, Maura ignored it, thinking that whoever was calling would figure out that Jane was still asleep and call back later. But after the first call was another, and another, and when she checked the screen it read eight missed calls. All from Casey. She didn't want to wake Jane, she'd looked so peaceful sleeping, and the dark shadows under her eyes had showed that she needed to rest. But eight missed calls in an hour meant that Casey really needed to speak to Jane. Maura sighed.

"Jane Rizzoli's phone," she answered politely.

There was silence on the other end.

"Hello?" she asked.

"Maura?" came Casey's reply.

"Hello, Casey."

"Where's Jane?" Why are you answering her phone?"

"She's still sleeping," Maura replied calmly. "May I ask why you're calling so early?" Balancing the phone between her ear and shoulder, Maura poured two steaming cups of coffee.

"I was worried about her," Casey said angrily. "I woke up and she was gone. Not even a note saying she'd taken Jo for a walk. I called her and she didn't answer and I was worried."

This was the reason why she shouldn't have answered Jane's phone, Maura thought. Casey was in her apartment, and Jane was in Maura's bed. She had come to Maura for comfort, while Casey was still in her bed, and the honey blonde had no idea how to process that information.

"I'm sorry, Casey," she finally said. "I'm sure Jane didn't mean to worry you. But I assure you, she's fine."

"I want to speak to her? Where is she?"

"I told you, she's sleeping–"

Maura was cut off by a hand on her shoulder and she jumped slightly, before realizing that it was Jane. The brunette held out her hand, gesturing for the phone.

"Hold on Casey, she's just gotten up."

Jane accepted the phone calmly and turned her back to Maura as she spoke.

"Hey."

Maura turned back to the coffee, trying not to eavesdrop but failing miserably.

"Look, sorry, I just came round to check on Maura and I fell asleep."

Maura cringed slightly at the brunette's casual tone; it was an accident, it seemed, that it was Maura Jane went to for comfort. Simple convenience. And it seemed that Maura was the one who was reading too much into a perfectly ordinary situation.

"It's nothing, Casey, I woke up and came round to see her."

That word made Maura flinch. Nothing. She meant nothing to Jane, at least in relation to her own feelings. They were friends and that was all.

There was a slight queasiness in Maura's stomach and she fought the urge to retch into the sink.

"Nah," Jane was saying, "I've got clothes here. I'm gonna go to the museum with Maura. But you can come to family dinner later if you want?"

Maura listens as Jane plans and when she says goodbye to Casey, it is gentle and almost loving.

Jealousy, Maura thinks, and indignation. That's what she's feeling. She doesn't want Casey at family dinner. She doesn't want him in _her _house. But she doesn't know what to do about that.

"Thanks for the coffee," Jane is saying, and Maura forces herself to focus on the brunette in front of her. She finds a smile from somewhere to give to her as she takes a sip from her own.

"So," she says, "We're going to see the exhibition?"

Jane looked a little nervous.

"Well, only if you want," she says. "I mean, if you already have plans then that's cool, but if you don't…"

"I'd love to," Maura interjects, cutting off Jane's rambling. "Just let me have a shower and get ready."

Jane's smile is contagious, and Maura thinks that maybe tonight won't be so bad if Jane just keeps on smiling at her like that.

* * *

The day passed quickly but was enjoyable for both women. They viewed the exhibit slowly as a delighted Maura spoke of the artists' influences and discussed the intentions of each work with great enthusiasm. Jane, on the other hand, trailed behind her friend, making the occasional sarcastic comment in between begging for a lunch break.

They had lunch at a nearby café, a burger and fries for Jane and a salad for Maura, before heading home to where Angela was already in the kitchen working on Sunday dinner. All in all, it was a very enjoyable day, which Maura thinks she would have appreciated more fully if the idea of Casey coming to dinner hadn't been looming over her. It was immature and foolish, but she didn't want Casey in her home. She didn't want him intruding on their weekly gathering of friends and family and she didn't want him anywhere near Jane. She supposed it was jealousy mostly, as well as a possessive streak that she didn't even know she had. But whatever the cause, the fact was Maura did not want Casey Jones in her life, but if she wanted to keep Jane, she was going to have to welcome him with open arms anyway. Maura didn't think she was a particularly selfish person, but the whole situation was just so unfair. Casey had swooped in and stolen the love of her life from her without even trying, and now she had to play nice and act like it didn't even bother her, as if she was happy for them. The thought made her teeth set on edge and she found herself frowning again as she stepped into the kitchen to help Angela.


	5. Chapter 5

Her house is full, which is something that Maura usually enjoys. However, Sunday dinner has been ruined for her by Casey's presence. He hadn't done anything rude or offensive, of course, it was just the fact that he was there, lingering at Jane's side, laughing at Frankie's jokes or complimenting Angela on her cooking. In fact, he acted like the perfect gentleman and the ideal son in law. The whole situation made Maura feel anxious. She could almost see Jane slipping out of her life in front of her eyes and she had no idea what she would do when that happened.

Later that night, as she lay in the gap between waking and slumber, Maura allowed her thoughts to wander. Surely there would be a way to get Casey out of the picture, a way to make things back the way they were and leave her and Jane in peace. She was the Chief Medical Examiner after all, surely she could get rid of Casey and make sure his body was never found. Or perhaps, she could find a way to make him go back to Afghanistan, make things back to the way they were. She chuckled slightly, shaking her head to herself. No, she wouldn't get rid of Casey, as intriguing as the idea was, that wouldn't be fair to Jane. As much as she wanted him out of the picture, she wanted Jane to be happy more, even if it came at her own expense. Maybe the problem was her. Maybe she needed to find someone, to distract from the loneliness clutching at the edges of her mind.  
That was an idea. She could find someone fairly easily, there were a plethora of men who would be eager to take her out and get to know her better, so to speak. And maybe, just maybe, it would make Jane a little jealous, or at least show her what it feels like to be the one left behind.

* * *

Monday morning found Jane in a shitty mood. Inviting Casey to Sunday night dinner had, in her opinion, been a complete and utter disaster. He had laughed too loudly at jokes that weren't even funny, and hovered next to her all night like her own personal puppy dog. Plus, Maura had been wandering around with a look on her face as though someone had kicked her turtle, and Jane had a horrible feeling as though she was the one who had put the look there. All in all, it had left Jane feeling a strange combination of guilt and annoyance which had hung around to pester her Monday morning.  
The familiar click of heels broke Jane out of her reverie.  
"Good morning, Jane."  
"Hey, Maur," she replied spinning around. Her gaze travelled up toned calves, admiring a no-doubt expensive dress which fit her best friend perfectly, to finally meet Maura's eyes. She couldn't help the smile that spread across her face upon seeing Maura beaming back at her. Hopefully, she was forgiven for whatever had upset Maura the night before.  
"You look happy today."  
Maura's smile only grew wider.  
"I've had a rather enjoyable morning so far," she says.  
"Yeah? What happened?"  
"I have a date tonight."  
Just like that, Jane's day got even worse.  
"A date?" her voice was strangled. "With who?"  
"Detective Daniels. I ran into him in the coffee shop this morning."  
"From Vice?" She knew her tone was incredulous, but she didn't quite know what to do about it. Maura had a date. With another Detective. A Detective that Jane knew was a chauvinistic asshole.  
"Yes," replied Maura, her smile dimming slightly at Jane's stony expression. "Is there a problem, Jane?"  
"He's a complete dickhead, Maur!" she burst out.  
"Do you even know him, Jane?"  
"Yes, actually! We went through the academy together. The only reason he is going out with you is to try and get in your pants."  
At this, Maura's smile finally slipped off completely, and she fixed Jane with an icy glare.  
"Of course, Jane. That's all that anyone ever sees in me."  
"You know that's not what I mean, Maura. I just think you-"  
"It doesn't really matter what you think, Jane! I can see whoever I want, if I want to sleep with Daniels, I will. And it'll be my decision, not yours."  
The day had gotten from bad to completely, utterly shit.  
"I'm not trying to tell you what to do, Maur. I just don't want to see you get hurt." Jane's voice was pleading, and her eyes met Maura's, filled with compassion.  
Maura's glare fell slightly and she sighed.  
"I know, Jane. But you don't have to worry about Daniels, he's not the one who's hurting me."  
The last part was said so quietly that she almost missed it. By the time it registered with Jane, Maura had already left, leaving her with a sick feeling of guilt in her stomach.

* * *

**A/N: Hey guys! Sorry this is such a short little chapter but I'm working on the next one where shit goes down! Rizzles is on it's way, it's just slow coming! Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed xx**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: So here's another one for you guys! Hope you enjoy xx**

* * *

His gaze has barely strayed above her neck all night and it's really starting to get on her nerves. She tried small talk, polite conversation and he'd mainly given short, noncommittal answers, his eyes still lingering on the scooped neckline of her dress, licking his lips at the glimpse of flesh available to him.

_This is what you wanted, _she reminded herself. _You wanted a distraction from Jane. You wanted to use the first attractive plaything you could find._

But she couldn't shake the fact that her skin was crawling under his leer and that she was becoming more and more uncomfortable as the night went on.

"Can I get you some desserts?" The waitress asks, popping up besides Maura's elbow, dragging her from her thoughts.

"No, thank you," Daniels shot in, before Maura could respond. "I'm planning on having this gorgeous woman for dessert." He winked, flashing a smile at her cleavage and Maura couldn't help but frown.

"Okay. I'll grab you the check," the waitress replied, her smile a little flat and obviously forced.

"You ready to head home, baby?" he asked, reaching across the table to take her hand. She tried not to flinch.

"Sure."

* * *

Casey was really starting to get on Jane's nerves. She'd wanted a relaxing night in, a few beers, watching the game on tv, but it seemed that he had wanted a more romantic evening.

He made her dinner, which was sweet enough, she guessed, and had stocked her fridge and cupboards. _You need someone to take care of you, _he had said, and she had frowned. She could take care of herself, and if she couldn't, she always had Maura.

After they'd finished eating, he'd insisted on putting on a romantic comedy that he 'thought she'd love,' even though her mind was so focused on Maura and her date, that she could have watched a blank screen.

"You okay, babe?" he asks. They're sitting on the couch, her feet in his lap and she is staring blankly at the characters onscreen.

"Mmmm."

"Is it work? A case? Talk to me, baby."

Jane frowned.

"It's Maura," she says.

"Oh."

There is a moment's silence.

"Is she okay?" he asks, somewhat begrudgingly.

"I don't know. She's on a date."

"Well that's good then."

Jane turned to look at him properly. His eyes were still fixed on the screen but there was a smile playing on his lips.

"It's not good, Casey. She's gone out with Detective Daniels! He's the biggest asshole I've ever met."

He laughs lightly.

"Jane, Maura is a big girl. I'm sure she can handle herself. It'll be good for her to get out a bit, find someone to spend time with who isn't you."

Jane's eyes narrow angrily.

"What do you mean?"

"What?"

"Someone who isn't me?"

"Babe," he says, his smile a little condescending. "You two do spend _a lot_ of time together. You're adults, you don't need your best friend to hold your hand for every single thing."

Her frown grew deeper.

"I _like _spending time with her."

"I know," he says, rubbing her feet gently. "But you spend more time with her than you do with me. I've only been back for a few days and majority of that time you've been with Maura."

"She's my _best friend_," Jane says, a little furiously.

"And I'm your boyfriend!"

"Are you? You come back after all this time and expect us to pick up where we left off! You don't even know me anymore, Casey."

"You don't mean that, Jane," he says quietly, looking at her with sad eyes. "Do you?"

She sighs deeply.

"I don't know, Casey. But I do think that I need a bit of space."

Her phone buzzes on the table and she gets up to answer it.

"I love you," he says, looking at her expectantly.

"I know."

* * *

He is everywhere. His lips on her neck, then her shoulder and lower. His hands travelling over her back, her thighs, her breasts.

Maura feels a little sick. Despite the fact that this was her intention, that she had brought him into her home for this very reason, the feeling of his tongue down her throat was making her nauseous.

"I want you so bad," he pants, breathing heavily into her ear. "You're so hot, baby."

Guilt, Maura realises. Her overwhelming feeling was one of guilt, rolling around in her stomach, causing her breathing to become laboured.

She felt like she was cheating on Jane.

The thought hits her and instantly she chokes back a sob.

"Stop! Stop. Just stop."

He pulls back instantly, looking at her face with an expression of surprise.

"Maura?"

She pushes at his chest, slipping out from next to him on the couch.

"Can you go? Please?"

"What's going on?" he asks, annoyed.

"Please, I need you to go." The last word comes out like a sob and before she can stop herself, she is crying.

"What the hell, Maura? You invited me back here! You can't just tell me to get out now."

She ignores him, trying to fight back the tears that are streaming steadily down her face.

"Please. Go."

He reaches for her shoulder, pulling her around to face him. He towers over her, fixing her with a glare.

"No. I'm not going. What the fuck is wrong with you?"

Another sob escapes and Maura wraps her arms around herself, trying to hold herself together.

"Get out. Or I'm calling the police."

"Maura-"

She grabs her clutch from the bench top and pulls out her phone.

"Okay! I'm going," he grumbles. "What a fucking bitch."

But Maura barely even hears him, she is sobbing so hard. She vaguely registers the slamming of the front door and she sinks to the floor, crying. _Jane, _she thinks, _I want Jane. _

She resists the urge to call her best friend. What would she say? I am so in love with you that I can't even have casual sex without bursting into tears? Or how about, leave Casey? Leave Casey and be with me?

Another sob slips out.

She needs Jane. As pathetic and weak as it makes her feel, she needs Jane right now. She needs her best friend.

Maura hits one on her speed dial and waits for Jane to pick up.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Thank you for all your wonderful comments. You guys are all so sweet! I was pretty nervous about this chapter but I hope you enjoy it. Let me know what you think! X**

* * *

Jane knocks on the door, waiting impatiently for Maura to answer it. When the blonde doesn't open it immediately, she pulls put her own key and walks quickly into the house.  
"Maura? Maur, where are you?" She asks, panicked. "Maura?"  
And then comes the response, in a tiny, choked voice.  
"Jane?"  
The detective rounds the corner and finds her best friend curled around herself on the kitchen floor, her mascara smudged down tear stained cheeks.  
"Oh my god, Maur."  
She throws herself to the the floor, gathering the honey-blonde into her arms, her panic only increasing when the doctor starts to cry again.  
"Jane," she whimpers.  
"What happened, Maur? What did he do? I swear if he hurt you, I'll kill him." Her voice is dark, angry. She is furious. How dare he? How dare anyone hurt Maura freaking Isles? She was so perfect, so innocent, she would never hurt anyone in her life. If he touched one hair on her head-  
"Jane." Maura was clutching at her shirt, burying her head in Jane's hair, crying softly.  
"I'm right here, Maur. Don't worry, I've got you."  
She waited, rubbing Maura's back gently until the doctors tears lessened. Finally, Maura pulled back, looking up at Jane with red rimmed eyes.  
"I'm sorry," she rasps, her voice hoarse from crying. "I didn't mean to pull you away from Casey."  
"Shut up, Maur," says Jane. "You need me, I'm here, okay? Casey or no Casey."  
This brought on a fresh wave of tears for the doctor, but they too eventually slowed.  
"What happened?" Jane asks quietly, once the honey blonde had stopped crying.  
Maura sniffs and pulls away from Jane.  
"Can we not talk about it?" She asks, getting up off the floor, and smoothing out the wrinkles in her dress.  
"Maur-"  
"Please, Jane?" The doctor interjects, her hazel eyes huge and desperate. "I'm fine, really, I just- can we talk about something else?"  
Jane studied her face for a long moment and then nodded slowly.  
"Okay, Maur."  
Maura smiled gratefully and moved over to the fridge, retrieving a beer which she handed to Jane, and a bottle of white wine.  
"How was your night?" she asks, as she pours herself a glass.  
Jane makes a face as she takes a swig of her beer.  
"Not so great. But better than yours, I'd say."  
The corners of Maura's mouth turn down ever so slightly, and Jane has a sudden urge to kiss her. Stop it, she thinks, she needs a friend right now, not another idiot drooling all over her.  
"What happened?" Maura asks. "We're you with Casey?"  
Jane nods, frowning.  
"Yeah. First of all he comes round, and practically smothers me to death-" seeing Maura's look of horror, she quickly corrects herself. "Not literally, Maur." She rolls her eyes and mirrors Maura's grin.  
"Sorry," the blonde says, "Go on."  
"He's just so needy," Jane complains. "And then he started going on and on about 'what was bothering me' and we ended up having a fight."  
"Oh."  
"Yeah."  
"Well, what was the fight about?"  
Jane looks down and starts playing with the label on her beer bottle.  
"Jane?"  
She sighs and looks up into those gorgeous hazel eyes.  
"It was sort of about you."  
"Me?" A perfectly sculpted brow raises. "What about me?"  
Jane frowns, and takes another swig of her beer.  
"He thinks that I spend too much time with you. Time that I should be spending with him."  
"Oh."  
Jane keeps her gaze resting on the bench top, unsure of what Maura's reaction to this will be and not sure if she wants to hear it.  
"Then he got mad when you called and I left him to come and check on you."  
"Oh."  
There is a moment of silence and Jane chances a glance up to try and gauge Maura's expression. The blonde is looking down into her wine glass but there is a single tear running down her cheek. Unaware of Jane's gaze, she looks up and the pain in her eyes is enough to make Jane feel like the biggest asshole that ever lived. But just as quickly, it is gone, the tear wiped away and Maura's fake society smile plastered across her face.  
"Okay," she says, too brightly. "Well, I guess I'll still see you at work then?"  
Jane isn't sure what shocked her more, the fact that Maura Isles just guessed, or that she seemed to think that Jane could throw away their friendship like yesterday's trash. Didn't she know? Didn't she realise that she was everything to Jane, and that the brunette would rather tell Casey to pack his bags and head back to Afghanistan than stop seeing this beautiful, intelligent, goofy woman standing before her.  
"Maura," she breathes, her own eyes welling up at the thought. "I would never- you're my best friend, Maur! How could you think that I would-"  
She breaks off, staring at the smaller woman, who has begun to cry again.  
"I'd understand," she says, her voice hollow, and a little choked. "It's normal for close friends to separate when one or both begin a serious relationship. Studies show that-"  
"Studies my ass, Maur. You come first, okay? If Casey can't understand how much you mean to me, then he's obviously not the one."  
Maura chokes out a sob, and Jane reaches her.  
"Don't cry, honey. Please, no more crying." She folds the honey blonde into her arms and holds her tight. It is only then that she realises that Maura is not the only one crying.  
"When you called tonight, and you sounded so upset on the phone, I was just so worried, Maur. I don't know what I'd do if anything happened to you."  
Maura shakes slightly in her arms, and Jane just squeezes her closer.  
"If he had hurt you, I-"  
She breaks off again; because the thought is too horrible even to imagine.

* * *

Maura is having trouble discerning dreams from reality. She is dreaming that Jane has just told her that she would pick the doctor over Casey, that she comes before him, before anyone. It has to be a dream, because why else would Jane say that. Se loves Casey, Maura is sure of it. But the detectives arms feel so real against her, and the kiss she presses into Maura's hair feels real too. She wants it to be real so badly, if she wakes up and Jane isn't there, if this is just her imagination, she doesn't know if she can handle if.  
"Jane," she sobs, but it's all she can think of to say. If this is a dream, she doesn't ever want to wake up. But if it's real, it means that there is a chance, a sliver of a hope, that Jane feels the same way; but Maura doesn't know how to go about asking. If she is really wrapped in the detectives arms right now and messes it up, she could lose Jane forever.  
But Jane had said that Maura comes first. Jane wouldn't say something like that unless she meant it, and the only reason she would put Maura before people that she loved was if she loved Maura just as much, or even more.  
"Oh god," she whimpers. She wants it to be true so desperately.  
Jane pulls back from her slightly and Maura clutches at her, reluctant to pull away from their embrace.  
"Come on, Maur," the brunette says. "Come and sit down."  
She leads the blonde to the couch and sits down, pulling at Maura until she is nestled comfortably against Jane's collarbone.  
"Jane," she whispers.  
"Yeah, Maur?"  
"I want to tell you what happened tonight." Maura squeezes her once and pulls back, she needs to be able to read Jane's expression as she says this. Jane looks a little worried but she nods once, her eyes fixed on her best friend's.  
"Okay."  
"I invited Detective Daniels back here tonight."  
Jane's eyes darken almost imperceptibly and there is a flash of something across her face, anger? Jealousy? Maura doesn't know.  
"I was planning on engaging in sexual intercourse with him." Yes, that was definitely anger in Jane's eyes.  
"So why didn't you?" She asks, her tone a little too harsh for a simple question.  
Maura takes a deep breath. Pull it together, she thinks, either way, you have to know.  
"We were making on this couch, and it just felt wrong."  
"Wrong, how? Wasn't his technique any good?" Jane asks sarcastically. That is Jane as Maura knows, when uncomfortable, deflect with sarcasm.  
"I felt like I was cheating on you." The words slip out without her approval, and once again tears are slipping down her face. "He wasn't you, Jane, and the only person that I want is you. I know that you're with Casey, and you love him but I-"  
She looks up at Jane's astonished face, and tried to pull herself together to say what it is that really matters.  
"I'm so in love with you, Jane. I thought that maybe I could get over you if I tried seeing other people but I just can't! I can't do it because I don't have anything left to give. It's all yours, Jane. I'm all yours. And I know that you might not want me but after what you said, I just, I had to try. I had to know, just in case."  
She finishes her rant with a deep breath and looks at Jane with tears still running down her face. Maura is shocked to see that Jane is crying too.  
"Oh god, Maur," she says.  
Is that good or bad? Maura doesn't know.  
"Jane-"  
But the rest of the sentence gets lost as Jane pulls her close and presses her lips against her own.  
Maura lets put a moan as she responds eagerly, her hands reaching up into dark curls, pulling Jane closer. Jane's hands trace up and down her spine, before one rests on her waist, clutching her close.  
"I love you, Maura. I love you so much." The moment isn't perfect. They are both still crying and Maura was on this same couch with a random man only hours ago.  
But hearing those words mumbled in between kisses is all Maura could ever remember wanting.  
Her and Jane together. That's all that matters.


End file.
